If you're grumpy and you know it clap your hands...

So I'll admit it I am a total grouch. I am in a funk. I hate everything, I am angry, I am sad about nothing and everything all at once. The following things are a few things making me this way:

-M and Mme R have been very stand offish since the week away.
-Le Boyfriend is going to Hungary to stay with AB's cousin over Easter
-My friend D is NOT coming for Easter-Therefore I will be alone
-Le Boyfriend does not understand why I'd be upset over the AB's cousin / Hungary situation
-I AM STILL freaking sick and I have had a headache for a week that is getting worse (yes yes I am going to the doctor this time I swear)
-The weather is CRAPPY

The following things are reasons that in spite of all the reasons above I should be happy:

-I get to love le Boyfriend
-I live in FREAKING Paris

I know a shorter list but I think that each of those count for at least four.

On a side note I went to get tested for HIV on Tuesday. I went with a friend before who had been asked by her pervious partner to go (it's a long story) and realized that I had never been tested. I thought that I had no reason to be tested since I am not a promiscuous girl and I am safe, BUT then I started thinking what if one of my exes (some of whom I KNOW to have been unfaithful) had contracted HIV? What if I accidentally passed it on to le Boyfriend? The chances were slim I know but I had to find out. (Because I am neurotic and worried myself into a tizzy.) Anyway so I went got blood taken and got the NEGATIVE results today. So no HIV for me YAY! I have been freaking out about it though and I am REALLY glad that I know for sure, even if I felt like a dirty whore going to the free AIDS clinic. The Doc shook my hand and congratulated me on being negative, which I found funny. The moral of the story is I am glad I got tested just for piece of mind I feel that it was the right thing to do (even if it made me temporarily feel like a dirty whore).

So that is my rant for today. I am also still reeling from the fact that I put up the video blog yesterday, what was I thinking. I promise all of you that I don't usually look quite that haggard!

So hopefully I will soon be out of this Debbie downer funk (that I have been in since Christmas it seems). Wish me luck!

Comments

Maybe if you put some scuzzy foot shavings IN your ice cream you'll enjoy it more!!

Hallie :)
Delicieux said…
Awe. Snap out of it!! I actually was in a funk like that not too long ago. It was really weird. EVERYTHING made me angry... but you learn to live through it and just get better.

Get your ass to the doc, girl!!! If you can go for AIDS testing... you should definitely be able to go for the cold/flu thing you've got.

Congrats on the negative test! I get tested every year... so it's something I look forward to - instead of worrying and dreading about!

(and it's cold and rainy here, too!!)

This whole comment was me sympathizing with you. Haha!
Cupcake Blonde said…
I hope you start feeling better soon. Nothing beats a cold that just won't go away!

I think it is great you got tested. I recently just got a whole panel done on me because I started to have a freak out moment that maybe I had contracted something years ago and just never knew about it and I would never forgive myself if I gave it to my husband. So to ease my mind since it was keeping me up at night worrying about not knowing, I had my gyno do a complete panel for all STDs and everything came back negative. So I understand the sudden need to know and the relief that your gut feeling of being okay was right.

I see you found Hallie! I just love her!

Popular posts from this blog

Public Service Announcement

My first school gripe

I'm confused...