Apple pie and such.

Well today is election day for my neighbours to the south. I wish you all the best and hope that you are all getting out to vote cause that's important! In Canada 42% of registered voters didn't even bother to get out and vote, so I hope that that 42% shuts up if something happens that they don't like. I mean seriously if you don't vote you have no right to bitch and moan if your candidate doesn't get elected or if the government does something that you disagree with because you chose not to have a say so SHUT UP!

Sorry I have just had a debate with one of those 42% and I have no patience for them.

On a more positive note I have chosen to bake an apple pie in honour of American election day! This is my first attempt to make a pie, so it may not turn out so well, but oh well!

I have been making a lot of stuff for the first time lately. Last night I made lamb stew and it was grreeeaaat! I have been cooking the "French" way by getting a recipe and then just ignoring it. I basically get recipes for guidelines on things like liquid amounts and cooking times and then just do whatever I want and it normally turns out really well!

However the reason that I have time to cook and experiment is that I still have no job. I am still applying and applying and I have sent my resume into countless recruiting firms and have posted resumes on monster and workopolis. In addition to that I have been applying to individual jobs every day. I am frustrated, but at least I have been able to apply for EI so I may be getting money soon, which will be nice. I have also decided to go back to school part-time starting in January to get a diploma in Human Resources Management, because I will use this as a backdoor into getting into the field that I really want.

As a result of all the change I have unfortunately been really down lately. I have next to no self-esteem and my notion of self-worth is at an all time low. I feel ugly and fat and worthless. I got into an emotional argument with le boyfriend over a wedding photographer because I was so convinced that we needed someone who could make me look less ugly. This is getting ridiculous and I am trying to snap out of it but I am having trouble. I am really getting sick of people telling me that I am just being negative, but here's the deal I am trying to establish a new life out of next to nothing. I have a wonderful fiance, but anyone who has ever moved in with their significant other for the first time knows that it's not easy. I do not regret moving here, but it is really really hard and I'm depressed. I am trying to look for ways out of my slump, for an example I have made contact with a horseback riding coach here and will hopefully be starting some lessons soon and we are looking into cooking classes and rock climbing as well. So it is not as though I am just saying "woe is me I'm sad" and expecting someone to fix it for me, but I am sad and I am struggling with it.

So that's all I have to say for now. I hope that everyone is doing well!

Comments

Delicieux said…
You're defintiely taking the right approach by adding hobbies to what you do all day - and finding other sources of happiness. I know that you can't let all of your happiness lie in one person... you've got to spread it around in case you're not happy with that one person at some point. (does that even make sense?)

Either way, You'll come through soon enough - and if you want to bitch and moan about it, that seems to be what's been on my agenda the past month or so, so bring it on!! ;)

I hope your pie turned out lovely!!
Odette said…
That makes perfect sense and I agree with you. My happiness doesn't lie with le Boyfriend, he is my partner in life, but he is not responsible for my happiness. Only I am responsible for that! I do need to spread myself out though! Thanks for the comment! :)
Anonymous said…
A big move is always hard. I moved from Washington to BC with my husband and it was a long time with no job and few friends, but it totally gets easuer, I promise!

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