Survey says...
So I feel like crud today, due to an awesome migraine that dropped me on my butt earlier. But I also feel kinda cruddy for another reason. So for the last year I have been questioning everything about myself. I can't seem to find anything I am "good" at, I mean I am passable at a lot of things, but not "good" at any of them. This comes a lot from my inability to find work. Job hunting is like constant rejection. I hate it and it is a really huge blow to my self esteem.
The one thing that I have always prided myself on is being a good friend. When all else has failed I still had that. Now I can't even say that. A few of my friends have had a really rough go of it and I have just let them slide. It's not even that I didn't care, I do, but I have this unnatural fear of saying the wrong thing, so instead of saying or doing something wrong I do nothing, which I know is worse. What's worse than all that? The fact that I feel like even talking about this makes it all about me, which is not what I want, I just want help! I want to know your opinion. What do you say to someone you care about when you know that they're having a hard time? When you know that nothing you're saying is ever going to be good enough, never going to make things any easier? Do you put an insane amount of pressure on yourself to say the "right" thing? Or am I just nuts?
Any help you can provide would be most appreciated.
The one thing that I have always prided myself on is being a good friend. When all else has failed I still had that. Now I can't even say that. A few of my friends have had a really rough go of it and I have just let them slide. It's not even that I didn't care, I do, but I have this unnatural fear of saying the wrong thing, so instead of saying or doing something wrong I do nothing, which I know is worse. What's worse than all that? The fact that I feel like even talking about this makes it all about me, which is not what I want, I just want help! I want to know your opinion. What do you say to someone you care about when you know that they're having a hard time? When you know that nothing you're saying is ever going to be good enough, never going to make things any easier? Do you put an insane amount of pressure on yourself to say the "right" thing? Or am I just nuts?
Any help you can provide would be most appreciated.
Comments
People deal with situations differently. Some people need to talk and talk and exhaust every thought they have in order to move past something, and others just need to be left alone to sort it out themselves.
One thing I find myself doing is throwing out the option "Hey, I'm around for coffee later if you want to chat." - then, they can take you up on it or decline. At least the offer is out there and they know you're thinking about them.
It all depends on the situation ;) You're a good friend, don't sell yourself short on that one. Your comments on my posts always make me happy!!