Please understand

Please understand that I don't see myself as you may see me.

Please understand that when you joke or make fun of me I take it to heart.

Please understand that I struggle every day to find something, anything that I like about myself.

Please understand that when I speak negatively about myself I'm not looking for validation and I'm not looking for you to tell me I'm wrong.  I am expressing something that I feel and believe to the very core of my being and it scares me.

Please understand that I would give anything to know what it feels like to be beautiful, to know what it feels like to be sexy, to feel desired.

Please understand that I hate being trapped in my head and I would give anything to get out, but this is where I am right now.

Please understand that I still need you in my life because I'm not sure how to make it through this alone.

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