My Life As You Know It

So I had hoped to make this a momentous occasion, but nothing momentous really popped up, so I am going to talk about something that has really irked me. I have spoken before about how much I love my family, they are the most important people in the world to me. When something is happening with one of them it really gets to me. ESPECIALLY when in indirectly involves me! Here's the deal; I have an Uncle who is an alcoholic. My Dad's side of the family all suffer from certain degrees of alcoholism (with the exception of my Dad who doesn't drink at all) but none as badly as this particular Uncle. He has a habit of getting trashed and ripping a strip off of people and breaking down crying while blaming EVERYONE for his problems, you know typical alcoholic behavior. Anyway with my pending nuptials my Dad called my Uncle to ask him not to drink at my wedding. My Uncle took offense to this request and decided not to attend my wedding. This didn't exactly thrill me, but ...

So today was the day of MJ's memorial. I am sorry to say that I am NOT a fan of all the hype his death is getting. I understand his place in music history and how great an influence he was, but for the love of goodness do they have to air it on every freaking channel! I do not want to watch it and I am mad that it is preempting the shows I did want to watch! Frack! The worst part is that this is not done! It will be on the news for weeks! In other news I just got back from a great five day vacation to Toronto and my future in-law's cottage. It was just nice to get out of the daily routine. We managed to see a lot of people too. In Toronto we saw my cousin, two of my friends from Vancouver, the nanny who took over for me in Paris and most of le fiance's friends. We also managed to get bridesmaid gifts, our wedding bands (ordered anyway) and Thank You cards. So all in all it was a very productive trip! At the cottage we had such a nice time hanging out with my fut...

I am actually surprised that it is only 98 posts! But I am slowly moving towards the 100 post mark, which won't take place until sometime next week, because it's Canada day tomorrow and we are heading to Toronto to visit some friends and family. I am very lucky because one of my best friends is getting married a few weeks after me, so I am able to talk to her about all my wedding anxieties. This is good because all my friends who got married a while ago or have never been married can't understand why I am scared of my wedding. My friend's wedding has been largely spurred on by her future mother in law who has shopped for her initiations, flowers and centerpieces. It sounds cute until you are there (picture the mother from My Big Fat Greek Wedding.) Fortunately my friend is very zen about the whole thing and was very clear about what she was looking for in terms of style etc. so things have been going very well for her! Having each other to talk to has been a life ...

In 60 days I am going to become someone's wife. I will stand with him in front of our immediate families and wedding party and vow to share our lives together. It is supposed to be the most special day of my life and I am dreading it. I want to be married, but I don't really want this wedding. I do not like the idea of being put on display like a show dog. I am not looking forward to having to dance in front of a bunch of people twice, having to be the centre of attention. I am really not looking forward to this. Do I want see my family and my friends and eat some good food, but this whole "wedding" idea scares the crap out of me. So in 61 days I will be happily married an on my way to Alaska. So I am looking forward to that day 61 days from now.

So I didn't get the job. They E-MAILED me to tell me! I mean seriously after all the shit they put me through THAT's what I get! Arg. You know what though? It really is their loss, because I can guarantee you that NO ONE wanted that job as much as me and NO ONE would have worked as hard for them as me. So there company I am not going to name. I wouldn't be surprised if they call me again in three months because the person that they hired didn't work out. So I spent last night crying nee BAWLING like an imbecile. I felt like someone had stabbed me in the chest. I just needed that win. I have had so many little defeats over the last few months that I REALLY needed that win. I felt deflated and useless and guilty, amongst other emotions. I really wanted to crawl into a hole and die because I just didn't feel worth the air I breathe. I know that it all sounds very dramatic, but I seriously just really needed the win. So after all that I woke up today and I a...

Living in Quebec is a character builder. Living in Quebec is a character builder. Living in Quebec is a character builder. I am repeating that to myself over and over, because eventually I will believe that instead of "Living in Quebec Sucks ASS." The job interview came and went and it didn't go as well as I would have liked. I did my best, but I probably sounded like a moron as I stumbled over my words a few times! I think that I answered the questions well, but I am sure that the other candidates answered them just as well. The main interviewer had to go on a "conference call" about 15-20 mins into the interview and then I saw her in the lobby about 10 mins later with the next candidate. Not a positive sign. While I was sitting in the waiting area I saw the previous candidate leave and mention that she'd e-mail her references. The remaining interviewer didn't even ask for my references, I had to offer them. They also said that they would be mak...

Tomorrow it's D-day. The day that will decide if I will in fact get my dream job or not. So PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE at 13:30 (1:30pm) EST (10:30am Pacific, 11:30am mountain, 12:30pm central) send me some good vibes. Some "Hire Me" vibes or some "Knock that interview out of the park" vibes or hey even some "make coherent sentences" vibes will do! Thanks in advance. Back to interview prep! :P